How to Find Your Style Again After Having a Baby

Last year, almost two years after I gave birth to my second son, I posted an outfit shot on Instagram. Not groundbreaking in itself, but what I realised on reflection is that it was the first time in years that not only did I want to post a shot like this (full length! Not holding a kid!) But that I felt good about it — like I’d got my style groove back. My DM’s and comments were flooded with chat from Mums about that very thing: losing your way with personal style when you have kids, your body changing and things fitting differently on your new body, and that weird limbo when you’re in the metamorphosis of motherhood and you’re not quite sure who this new version of you is yet, let alone what their style is. I certainly wasn’t alone in feeling lost in the fashion jungle, so I took it to three Mums, whose job it is to style — and be stylish — to help us all find our way back.

Michelle Banares, Creative Producer, mother to Zev, 4.

My style is… Scandi, 90s, chic! I love mixing old with new! I will always be an advocate for second-hand shopping. There’s so much more character and beauty in the hunt of finding something pre-loved.

After Zev… For about a year I felt like I was just dressing for comfort. No matter how hard I’d try to put together a ‘pre-Zev outfit’ I’d just go back to chucking on sweats and sneakers (not in the cool way, sadly). It got to a point that I would wear baby vom tees OUT OF THE HOUSE because I didn’t have time (or the care) to change! I knew that it wouldn’t last forever, so I just rode the style-rut phase and actually, it’s really helped find my personal style today!

My style has evolved… For the better! About 18 months after having Zev I was so self-conscious about my body. I didn’t know how to dress for the new “me” so I had to learn what works for my body type. I feel so much more confident in the way I dress now! I’m also fully off wearing the flowy jumpsuits I used to love; they were comfortable and efficient, but when I look at photos it’s like I was wearing sacks haha.

My best tips for finding your post-baby style are… Change is OK! It took me a while to come around but I found what works for me and you will eventually too. I’m a big believer in getting the basics and then experimenting from there. So, get yourself comfortable enough to be wearing the basics (whether that’s a good pair of jean and a white tee) and then think about everything else later. I will also forever preach that accessories are everything. Even with the most simple of outfits, accessories and a cute bag can truly transform a simple look into something more you!

Charlotte Stokes, stylist, creative consultant and Mum to Fox, 6 and Winter, 4.

My style is… Vintage, easy, and utilitarian. My philosophy has always been to buy pieces I love, but not a lot of them. I will wear the same thing over and over again because it makes my life easier and I get to really know what works for me. It also avoids clutter in my wardrobe — and my mind.

Since having kids… I think I am still finding my style groove! I used to wear really unique vintage pieces, which takes time to find. Now I have a much more basic style, almost like a uniforms, and I always go for comfort. I now have staple go-to pieces I wear everyday so I don't need to have the mental load of making the what-to-wear decision every day.

My style has evolved… To be much more utilitarian these days rather than the feminine boho it used to be. But now that I am out of the baby stage I am excited to start experimenting with style again and I’m slowly starting to reclaim by style by buying key pieces that I love again that aren’t just about comfort, but still work for my (new) life as a busy working mum. My body has changed so much with more curves than I used to have, so I do find that more tailored pieces work better for me now as they are more flattering. I tend to wear a lot more black now too, but that just for ease really, whereas before babies I was really into colour and print.

My best tips for finding your post-baby style are… Firstly, to get rid of anything old or stained that does not make you feel good/stylish. Instead, invest in a couple of super comfortable pieces that are more polished but will serve the same purpose, i.e: comfortable and easy but that you can throw it on in a rush and still feel good. Also get rid of anything you will no longer wear. It’s always important to start fresh and clear some clutter so you can see the pieces that you still love (and that work for you) and build on that. Then, think about what style you would like to achieve, and the pieces you’ll need in your wardrobe to build on that style. For example I love vintage American prep with a hint of ’70s. I feel this works for my life and it’s a style I love. Then, think of 10 pieces you need in your wardrobe to help you create this style. It should be made up of 70 per cent wardrobe staples (think: a new pair of jeans, an everyday sneaker) and 30 per cent statement pieces that you absolutely love. Mix up the price points depending on what you can afford and add some key accessories to the mix. Write them all down, and purchase them slowly, maybe once a month or so you can really think about each piece and make sure it’s the right one (not an impulse buy). This should help you achieve a really strong everyday style. You can do the same for work if you need a different aesthetic for the office too.

Lattitia Taylor, stylist and Mum to Lucy, 2.

My style is… Minimalistic, tailored and neutral. My style has naturally matured as I’ve aged and I’m much more risk-averse, but I’d say that’s also due to trial and error and finding what suits my body shape more so than becoming a mother. That said, I have hung up my incredibly high heels — I’m all about the low sensible heel now.

Since having Lucy… I’m now time poor so I've temporarily surrendered my body over to my child — not to mention my priorities have changed. For someone who was once following all the seasonal fashion trends, I now only had time to research tog ratings, onesie zip detailing and the best organic cotton. In all honesty, it wasn’t until recently that I’ve come out of the fog and begun to make more of an effort when it comes to personal style. In saying that I’m either extremely polished or sporting the ultimate mum uniform- a messy bun and activewear.

My style has evolved… since Lucy was born I want it to be easy, calming and tranquil – everything a Mum’s life isn’t. While I still love the same styles, it's more important for me to feel good about myself than to be on-trend. I invest in pieces that are flattering for my frame and that don't make me second-guess my outfit once I’m out the door. Motherhood is like a rebirth of your former self so it’s not surprising that includes style too.

My best tips for finding your post-baby style are… A woman's body changes shape so much during and after pregnancy. I know it can feel hard to embrace a changing figure but I think our bodies are amazing and should be celebrated. I would recommend wearing anything that gives confidence, accentuates parts of your body you love the most and clothes that feel comfortable (especially for toddler chasing). Invest in items that never go out of style such as a white t-shirt, jeans, a trench coat, a black evening dress, a blazer, a soft grey jumper, and a white linen dress. I think there’s a shift (or maybe it’s just getting older?) to buying a few quality pieces rather than a wardrobe full of fast fashion. I also think that bringing out a well-loved, quality item from the wardrobe (like a shirt or blazer) can remind us of our old self (which we all need) and then all you need to do is match that with a new pair of wide-leg trousers and you'll have a refreshed version of you! We all gravitate towards pieces that we’re comfortable and confident in so really focus on buying well when it comes to your MVPs.